Come For The Banter - Stay For The Disappointment
Nucks Fan Rebuild & Retool Center - Come For The Banter - Stay For The Disappointment
It's the spring equinox, which means we're a quarter of the way through the solar year, and thankfully near the end of the catastrophe that has been this year's NHL season. It's about four weeks until Adam Foote is hopefully relieved from whatever it is he does with the Canucks, probably about a week until the Canucks are mathematically eliminated from the playoffs and five weeks until they lose the draft lottery and pick third.
It's also game night, and time for TANKO, the bingo-like game that celebrates futility.
| T | A | N | K | O |
| Marcus Petterson out of position on a goal. | Rookie makes mistake, minutes reduced | Opposition scores 5 or more goals | Opposition has a player out-scoring EP40 at less cost | Jake DeBrusk fails to score |
| Player/coach mentions “system,” whatever that means | Atu Raty shortchanged on ice time | Opposition scores empty-net goal | Evander Kane takes a dumb penalty | Foote says “trust the process.” |
| Video review goes against the Canucks | Opponent scores hat-trick | Thatcher Demko injured | PO Joseph out of position on a goal | Opposition player bumps scoring slump |
| Brock Boeser held goal-less | EP40 <50% in faceoff circle | Canucks Shut Out | Marcus Petterson out of position on a goal. | Coach says “resilient/resilience” at game-day skate/pregame |
| EP 40 falls down/is knocked down | Marcus Petterson is out of position on a goal | Penalty kill surrenders goal | Power play fails to score | Foote laments continued mistakes post-game |
