Come For The Banter - Stay For The Disappointment
Nucks Fan Rebuild & Retool Center - Come For The Banter - Stay For The Disappointment
| T | A | N | K | O |
| Jake DeBrusk fails to score | Rookie makes mistake, minutes reduced | Canucks penalized in the last three minutes of the game | Evander Kane takes a dumb penalty | Opposition scores 5 or more goals |
| PO Joseph blunder leads to scoring chance | Foote says “trust the process.” | Opposition scores empty-net goal | Opponent scores hat-trick | Veteran makes bonehead play, minutes not reduced |
| Video review goes against the Canucks | EP40 <50% in faceoff circle | Thatcher Demko injured | Foote says “right there” in postgame comments | Opposition player bumps scoring slump |
| Brock Boeser held goal-less | EP 40 falls down/is knocked down | Player/coach mentions “system,” whatever that means | Foote laments continued mistakes post-game | Team mis-reports/mis-evaluates injury in previous 72 hours |
| Opposition has a player out-scoring EP40 at less cost | Marcus Petterson is out of position on a goal | Penalty kill surrenders goal | Power play fails to score | Coach says “resilient/resilience” at game-day skate/pregame |
Block out each bit that applies (hint: Demko is always injured. That's a freebie) before/during/after the game.
If you do the bingo-line thing with the above matrix of misery, post your card on bluesky with a #canucks #tanko hastag.
What do you win? You, dear friend, will gain the odd feeling of having done something the Canucks haven't done much of: win.
(We'd offer prizes, but our marketing department blew our budget on cheap swill from a dingy Granville Street bar yesterday afternoon, and now we're broke.)
