Come For The Banter - Stay For The Disappointment

Nucks Fan Rebuild & Retool Center - Come For The Banter - Stay For The Disappointment

March 12 TANKO - celebrate the failure!

March 12, 2026

- Vern Faulkner

Here at Nucksmisconduct, we acknowledge the pain of it all. But we also try to brighten the day with a little levity, Tanko-style.

This is a BINGO style game, celebrating failure.

First to post to Bluesky will feel the joy of winning - something the Canucks know little of. Especially at home.

T	A	N	K	O
Marcus Petterson out of position on a goal.	Rookie makes mistake, minutes reduced	Opposition scores 5 or more goals	Opposition has a player out-scoring EP40 at less cost	Jake DeBrusk fails to score
Player/coach mentions “system,” whatever that means	Atu Raty shortchanged on ice time	Opposition scores empty-net goal	Evander Kane takes a dumb penalty	Evander Kane given ice-time instead of rookie who gives a damn
Video review goes against the Canucks	Opponent scores hat-trick	Thatcher Demko injured	PO Joseph out of position on a goal	Opposition player bumps scoring slump
Brock Boeser held goal-less	EP40 <50% in faceoff circle	Canucks Shut Out	Marcus Petterson out of position on a goal.	Team mis-reports/mis-evaluates injury in previous 72 hours
EP 40 falls down/is knocked down	Marcus Petterson is out of position on a goal	Penalty kill surrenders goal	Power play fails to score	Canucks penalized in the last three minutes of the game

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