Come For The Banter - Stay For The Disappointment
Nucks Fan Rebuild & Retool Center - Come For The Banter - Stay For The Disappointment
Well, this is gonna be ugly. One of the east's top teams, a team that pressures hard, gets a crapton of shot volume and on the other side, whatever the blazes the cobbled-together blend of AHL players and broken NHL-ers the Canucks have become.
It's gonna be ugly. We all know that. But you can numb the agony by playing TANKO, which is like bingo, but without the dabbers and singularly-focused grannies.
Here's the card for the impending disaster.
| T | A | N | K | O |
| Jake DeBrusk fails to score | Rookie makes mistake, minutes reduced | Canucks penalized in the last three minutes of the game | Evander Kane takes a dumb penalty | Opposition scores 5 or more goals |
| PO Joseph blunder leads to scoring chance | Connor Garland fails to score | Opposition scores empty-net goal | Opponent scores hat-trick | Veteran makes bonehead play, minutes not reduced |
| Video review goes against the Canucks | EP40 <50% in faceoff circle | Thatcher Demko injured | PO Joseph out of position on a goal | Opposition player bumps scoring slump |
| Brock Boeser held goal-less | EP 40 falls down/is knocked down | Player/coach mentions “system,” whatever that means | Foote laments continued mistakes post-game | Team mis-reports/mis-evaluates injury in previous 72 hours |
| Opposition has a player out-scoring EP40 at less cost | Marcus Petterson is out of position on a goal | Penalty kill surrenders goal | Power play fails to score | Canucks Shut out. |
First to find a line (On the card, not in the bathroom of that sleezy Granville dive bar) posts the results to Bluesky with a #canucks and #tanko tag.
