Great Tanking News! Last Place Team Defended The Basement - With 21 Turnovers!

Good news... Got a goal... so that's as good as it gets.

Here's what we learned:

Nucks played poorly and lost pathetically. 60 minutes in the ROG is like a decade in hell. Or 5 years of the JR/PA management-pocalypse.

Canucks got the 1st goal in the 1st period and kept the lead for almost 17 minutes. Then caved the rest of the way.

Tank you for watching.

The #Canucks have reached the League basement and are now digging an elaborate subterranean lair, where they will store No Movement Clauses.

— CrankyCanucksFan 🇨🇦🏒 (@crankycanucksfan.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 9:29 PM

Period 1

Canucks score first! Even better for the scouts drinking heavily in the box, it was a Kane goal. Off his skate. Imagine that in the playoffs! Magic!

That 1st Nucks goal was for the scouts... who gets the 2nd goal? Gnarland, perhaps. He's kinda way overdue.

— NucksMisconduct (@nucksmisconduct.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 7:34 PM

There was no 2nd Nucking goal. And worse, the Stars even it up - with a fluke goal off the back boards and back off Tolo's skate into the net.

guy who barely scores gets a fluke goal. the #canucks 2025-26 experience is something else.

— jbearz.bsky.social (@jbearz.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 7:40 PM

1-1 after 1.

Period 2

Welcome to the utter collapse period.

There's something about the NHL's 3rd best team making the 32nd team look like the worst team in the league.

Let’s go Stars! Demoralize us in to trading everyone baby! #Canucks

— Luc (@lcfrst.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 8:18 PM

Of course the Nucks PK give up a goal and this pathetic period ends with Stars up 3-1 while outshooting the tanked Nucks 16-4.

The funny part is Adam Foote is coaching to win. #Canucks

— Daniel Fung (@danielfung.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 8:24 PM

Just think. We are gonna be worse next year. Just gotta hope Demko comes back 100% so we can get something for him. If we get McKenna he might do a Lindros. And then we can trade him for a number 1 centre and a couple of good wingers. #Canucks

[image or embed]

— DJTaxman77 (@taxman77.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 8:25 PM

Period 3

Welcome to the next utter collapse period.

Not satisfied with just winning, Stars want to crush the Nucks. And the Nucks are assisting - giving up juicy turnovers that end up behind Tolo.

Do you want a blow-by-blow of all the next 3 goals?

Me neither.

Gift from M Pettersson leads to goal number four for DalASS. #Canucks Trade trade trade c’mon.

— LesnielBC 🇨🇦🇩🇰 (@lesnielbc.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 9:01 PM

Remember when Marcus Pettersson was supposed to be a steadying presence on the Canucks blueline? #canucks

— Gary Moen (@gmoen.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 9:02 PM

Stop reading now. It's not gonna get better.

And worse, the always reliable Nucking strategy ISN'T working!

Point of Order: #Canucks getting outshot. Isn't that how they win a game?

— NucksMisconduct (@nucksmisconduct.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 8:28 PM

But still... we have to remember the big picture. Takes a village to lose enough games to pick first.

This is no ordinary tank. This is a Panzer. #Canucks

— Steve Burgess (@steveburgess53.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 9:13 PM

Obviously, big picture, the losing is good. But it's still hard to shake the fact that this is what it feels like to sit down to watch a #Canucks games right now.

[image or embed]

— Brayden Fengler (@braydenfengler.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 9:10 PM

Stars score 6 unanswered goals while the [redacted] Nucks leave Tolo to expect the unexpected and play 1 on 5.

Hahaha! Sooooo many turnovers. 🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️ #canucks

— 🇨🇦 BiPolar Guide 🇨🇦 pronouns: who, whom, whoever, whomever. (@bipolarguide.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 9:28 PM

Nucks waste another ROG game with nary a worry. But lots of turnovers.

On the bright side, Nucks did manage to put 3 shots on net. Only 5 times less than the visitors shot.

And our multi-millionaires still get paid while Franny's revenues shrink, so that's nice.

Well back to the good ol days where people can buy upper bowl seats and go sit in the lower bowl. I have never seen Rogers this empty. No way Aquilini is gonna accept this for more than a year. Next year he is losing so many of the long term season ticket holders. #Canucks

— DJTaxman77 (@taxman77.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 7:20 PM

Does anyone remember when the Canucks beat Dallas 5-3 last October?

Anyone?

No? Ok... moving on.

So.

Guess that's what a Stanley Cup contender looks like against the 32nd-place team in the league.

We got a way to go.

-- Thursday

I think this may be the worst Canucks team in history.

-- Atty

That was a God awful effort tonight. Every so called veteran was terrible / invisible This close to the trade deadline, just shows that nobody over the age of 25 should off the trade table. #canucks

— Gary Moen (@gmoen.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 9:47 PM

OBSERVATIONS:

Nucks played a sloppy, dispirited road home game and lost.

Players of Interest:

• Myers! Didn't play again. PA hoping he'll waive his NMC so he can have something accomplished to toss into a word salad next week.
• Petey has not scored in 13 games.
• Gnarland - hasn't scored a goal since late last year.
• Hogz had a couple glorious chances - without scoring. Hasn't scored since April, 2025.

The #HockeyGods are not pleased with Hogz this year. First the preseason injury and now he's absolutely snake bitten. 🙄 #canucks

— Dragon Was Slayed (@522intoovertime.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 8:36 PM

It seems that the #Canucks have set their clocks back to 1973.

— Erin Butler (@eleighbutler.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 10:15 PM

In 22 games since December 30, the #Canucks have a record of 2-16-4

— Adam Kierszenblat (@adamkblat.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 10:08 PM

Zero chance Foote’s gone before the end of the season. I would prefer somebody else — willing to use what’s left of this season developing the young guys — but that isn’t happening. I’m more worried about *next* season, since it isn’t clear to me that the #Canucks plan to move on.

— puck2thehead.bsky.social (@puck2thehead.bsky.social) March 2, 2026 at 11:06 PM

GAME HIGHLIGHTS

Shortie and Dave in the dark empty ROG of losing.

GAME STATS

COMMENTING OUT LOUD

Kane reveals the naked truth about losing!

M-Petey gets a presser?!

Footsey fumbling through the Nucks bumble-fumble game.

We knew this game wouldn't be fun to watch. And for those of us unlucky enough to watch it, turns out there was no fun at all.

Nucks should be able to bounce back from this horrible loss for their next ROG game on Wednesday. Except... it's against the Canes. So... there's that grim loss to look forward to.

Still... be nice if the post-Olympic Nucks could score more than single goal in a game. Could happen, right? Let's find out.