Dear NHL, you have a problem.

There’s no polite way to say this, so let’s just call it as it is: your “discipline” process is a farce. It’s been this way for a while, but your pathetic collective defence of George Parros’s ridiculous five-game suspension for potentially ending the career of Auston Matthews shows us all that you have no clue about player safety, and haven’t had a clue for a hell of a long time.

Look. I’m going to come clean, here. I’ve been calling your discipline group the “Department of Player Indifference” for the better part of a decade and a half. I’ve seen others call it similar things (“Department of Player Endangerment” being one of the better ones.)

The thing is Parros has been an utter disaster from the get-go, carrying on a tradition of inconsistency and incompetence. Sure, the Radko Gudas hit on Matthews is Exhibit A for the immediate moment. Gudas is a repeat offender with a track history of not giving a shit about anyone else, but not a single educated pundit expected more than a few games, because the history of the DOPS under Parros has favoured the offenders.

Let's crack open a very scary closet of ineffective, insufficient discipline, shall we?

For Canucks fans,

• Brandon Rust getting a mere three games for trying to knock Brock Boeser’s noggin into the next time zone.
• Connor Zary getting a mere two games for drying to knock Elias Pettersson’s noggin into the next time zone.
• Tyler Jeannot receiving a mere three games for poughing Brock Boeser’s noggin into the next month.
• Jason Dickinson getting fuck-all for faceplanting Filip Chytyl’s face into the boards from behind.

For the rest of the audience:

Brad Marchand not even receiving a safety hearing for this dirty, predatory head hit:

https://youtu.be/1Y1miXPP2Mc?si=k8ObSIw6xzyBDMRo

Tom Wilson. His entire career has been a track record of intentionally injuring opponents, with insufficient repercussions.

How did Mikko Rantinen avoid being suspended for a good period for this dirty hit? In any rational world where player safety is a consideration, this is five games. I’d support ten.

Here’s the thing. I could spend the entire afternoon digging up clip after clip of hockey players doing dangerous things that have endangered players safety, careers and in some cases (Tom Wilson, this means you) lives. There’s dozens of them.

I’m not one for advocating people lose their jobs, but it’s high time Parros was given opportunities to be employed doing something – anything - else. Bring in someone who will reset the lax standards, and start handing out some suspensions with meat behind them.

Just like the Canucks have lost focus with no real creativity to their game, recycling the same broken "system" game after game and being generally uninspiring, we're gonna do the same with tonight's TANKO, which fields the same lineup as produced winner last game.

You should know the drill by now. Good luck.

Working for a retail store that opens a huge new location and closes just a few years later sucks. Especially if you're there long enough to see the collapse happen in real time.

Everyone knows it's sinking, and that's a rough haul. No one wants to be there, but that's who's paying you so off to work you go. Fewer customers, then fewer people working your department, then shorter hours, then you're working two departments...

On the positive side, you probably won't have to do interviews every two days to explain why the store isn't working.

One Week

We know what the team needs. The unrestricted free agents need to get a return, and at least one other contracted player has to go. It almost doesn't matter which one, though we went with Garland because his move would be the least complicated. It seems that Tyler Myers is contemplating his future, which is quite a surprise.*

That there's a demand isn't the surprise, but that the team asked him to consider the move is. Of all the players on the team, he is the least likely to want this. And yet, he's the first one we know of since Kiefer Sherwood was sent to San Jose. Myers has close ties to his community, family reasons to stay, and has a full no-move clause. He lives in the province year-round. He obviously doesn't want to go.

It's hard to say Myers counts as a long-term contract. He only has a single year remaining, and it's for a perfectly reasonable $3 million. No, we need to see one of the big boys leaving by March 6. One of those "not expiring until the '30s" deals. Then we'll be convinced.

Until then, the three UFAs will have to do.

But What?

It's entirely possible that David Kampf doesn't move along. He's more valuable than Lukas Reichel, but still going to be an extra, in-case-of-emergency player. Not a terrible loss, there. But if this management group can't get some kind of return for Evander Kane and Teddy Blueger, it will be catastrophic.

Not because the team really REALLY needs an extra third-round pick, though that's a good thing to have. It will signal disaster because of how it will show that they can't do what is Step One of a standard NHL season, never mind a rebuild.

They have been very good at keeping potential moves quiet until they happen, but these are simply too obvious to be secrets. The Myers offer needed to be made public because of him not playing games, but his circumstance is the exception here, not the rule. So management can still surprise us all.

Skip To The Yule

Unfortunately, they likely missed their best opportunity back in December. The league was much tighter then, and odds were that at least 20 of them believed they had some shot at making the playoffs. Another half-dozen weren't just locks, but Stanley Cup competitors. That's a huge market with not many buyers.

Before the holiday break and after Quinn Hughes was moved would have been an excellent time to sell. The team was shaken up, anyone could go, make us an offer. Or even better, here's an offer we're making. Have the Ghost of Christmas Future visit a few general managers and remind them that only one can win each year, so they'd better act now!

Alas, here we are in March and the limitations of far more teams are apparent. The Blues are sellers, as are Calgary and Manhattan. Toronto should be selling, though lord knows with that town. And not only are fewer teams buying, the ones who are close a little scared to make a major change for fear of disrupting team chemistry.

Waddya Want?

It's also possible that none of the long-term players get moved out by the end of the week. That's more acceptable than not being able to move one of the UFAs, but that's almost beside the point. What moving one of those players would do is signal that the team was taking the rebuild seriously.

The Vancouver Canucks aren't going to be a good team next season. Everyone, from the owner to the casual fan, should know this. And that's fine. We can accept that. In a city of 2 million general managers, very few of them are unaware of how a rebuild can happen and what that will mean.

But.

That means the team needs to build trust. We - the ticket-buying public - need to trust that these are the people who can guide the team over the rough stretches. Bad teams we've seen, and plenty of them. Uncoordinated teams, ramshackle teams, desperation teams, all of these have asked us to watch them. And for the most part, we do. Because sports is fun. This ain't life and death, here, and we know it.

But don't frikkin' bore us. Don't trot out a lazy team. Don't saddle us with dead-eyed vets playing out the string of their careers. Yes, a couple painful deals can come back, but have them attached to interesting players, at least. Bring in people interested in being mentors. A Cup ring or two. Players trying to get their stats up for one more deal.

Next Year

In an ideal world, we won't see whoever the team drafts this year until the second half of 2027. Let the losing build character and cohesion and scrappiness. We LOVE that stuff! This is the team of Trevor Linden and Stan Smyl and Harold Snepsts. Curt Fraser and Gino Odjick and Alexandre Burrows are jerseys you can still see at the arena.

Don't get us wrong: we love Pavel Bure and Markus Naslund and Jyrki Lumme, too. But we know when they aren't here. There's no need to pretend they are. You can trust us.

Now it's your turn.

*As a quick aside, may I say I have absolutely hated the way this management team has treated their players and coaches? Strong-arming Elias Pettersson into signing a deal before he wanted, waving off captain Bo Horvat in his contract year, berating Brock Boeser after his best season ever, publicly hanging Bruce Boudreau out to dry like a duck in a Pender Street window. Unnecessary garbage. Very mild rant over.

I owe a lot to Jim Robson, the legendary play-by-play voice of the Vancouver Canucks. I never met the man, but he touched my life. Hell, I wouldn't be who I am today were it not for him.

And I never met the man.

When I was a kid growing up in the backwoods of Prince George, B.C., I listened to a lot of Canucks games - and watched the BCTV broadcasts where Robson had the call.

Inspired by Robson, I decided at some point in my young adult life to try to do play-by-play. I managed to wangle my way into a lot of hockey barns, and sat in the stands with a headset and a tape recorder, trying to teach myself the craft.

Here's the thing about professionals: they make the hard stuff look easy. Play by play is not easy. I tried to reach out to radio stations, but ... with no training, no degree, no diploma ... I don't think I even got a rejection. Every radio station ignored my contacts.

So one summer, I discovered that Robson lived on Saltspring Island. And I did something I have only ever done once: I wrote a letter to someone famous. I wrote a letter asking Robson for guidance. I have no clue what I was thinking: seriously, what was a legend like he going to tell me? How could he help?

Here's the stunning part: Robson responded. He had typed out the response, with a few backspace-corrections that suggested he wasn't intimately familiar with the typewriter. There weren't many words, but they were encouraging. Keep trying. Keep knocking on doors. Find ways to get into hockey rinks, baseball diamonds, whatever.

I did just that.

Then one day, I landed in a hockey rink in Saanich, and found a game with free admission. I discovered the games were free, every Sunday. Well, heck. So I packed my tape recorder, packed my headgear and went. Junior B hockey on Vancouver Island was a rough-and-tumble thing back then, but it was fast, it was free, and it helped me get better.

Back in those days, there was a fledgling digital communications system, Fidonet. It interconnected bulletin boards with each other. One day, I sat down and wrote about the game. Did the same next week, too. And in response, someone said "your stuff should be in the newspaper."

Again, I have no idea what made me think of it, but I went down to the newspaper offices with my printouts and some freelance writing copy, looking for .... well, whatcha got?

That led to a gig writing a once-per-week column for - if I recall, $15per. 600 word cap. Go.

I went.

That once-a-week column became well-read. I started capturing pictures (poorly). I ended up doing some work for a short-lived enterprise called Island Sports Fan, which was overseen by a sports-passionate dude who was also a football coach. He recruited me into officiating football. At the same time,  I ended up writing for the local Black Press papers, freelancing to BC Hockey Now, and whatever else would take my copy. Then I landed a gig as a reporter for the Saanich News. I got a side-gig promoting a junior B hockey club, at a time when the Vancouver Island Junior Hockey League started becoming a proving ground for high-end talent. I've watched the names you might still recognize play as kids. In time, I became an editor - first the Esquimalt News, then that and the Oak Bay News, then a central desker, all the while officiating football at higher levels.  Went east, managed a daily, kept putting food on the table writing about all sorts of things, but always writing about sports.

I've done some play-by-play, too. Never got good at it - good enough for cable TV, maybe, but not much more. (I still remember listening to a recording where I totally muddled "Powell River Paper Kings power play...") If you need some indication of how much I treasured Robson's influence, I would always pause in the middle of a broadcast to honour the volunteers of sports, mirroring Robson's ritual of thanking shut-ins and the blind.

The journalism career lasted 20-odd years. If you care, you'll see my name connected to regional and national awards. Turns out I was good at the print side of things.... and I would never have discovered that if I hadn't been sitting in hockey rinks trying to follow Robson's footsteps.

I mention the football gig because that's led to my current career as a building official: turns out having a brain trained for rules and able to manage conflict is good in the current gig too.

And it all traces back to one man, writing one letter, encouraging one young totally lost kid to keep trying. The path wasn't one that I thought I'd take, but I took the first step due to Jim Robson.

Thanks Jim.

Follow along during tonight's game. Fill in the squares. (Hint: Matthew Knies at $7.75 m/year is outscoring EP#40, at $11.3 m/year).

First one to fill out a line gets to make a post on Bluesky with the hashtag #canucks and has a moment of feeling what it's like to win something.

Welcome Vern to our group of disgruntled Nucks fans as guest columnist. Vern is a veteran sports writer and worse... veteran Canucks fan. He has followed the escapades of this franchise since the mid-70s - so he knows hardships like few of us. And yet this latest management regime has driven him to the edge of sanity, to come out of retirement and vent about it. 
- jimmi

With the Vancouver Canucks in the middle of a staggering eight nine-game losing streak and parked firmly in last place in the NHL, there are a lot of fans wondering how the hell we got here. Blame management. General Manager Patrick Allvin and President Jim Rutherford have blundered more often than not, and we are here entirely due to their collective, repeated failures.

Error #1: December 2022-September 2023 - Keeping J. T. Miller despite his toxic background

Long before the Canucks shipped out Bo Horvat in favour of J. T Miller, there was abundant evidence that Miller was a problematic individual with a toxic personality.

The most obvious of those came Dec. 30, 2022, when Miller infamously smashed his stick on the net because Colin Delia hadn’t gone to the bench for an extra attacker in the late stages of what was then a 3-2 game against the Winnipeg Jets. That wasn’t the first time that season Miller was involved with issues with team-mates, either – he had a public disagreement with Luke Schenn Oct. 23, 2022. At the time, Miller was an Alternate Captain. (How he got the “A” on his shirt in the first place, I have no idea.)

Rutherford was hired Dec. 9, 2021 and Allvin was hired Jan. 26, 2022. They had time to act, and didn't. There was ample reason to move Miller at the end of the 2022-23 deadline, but instead, management doubled down, and despite obvious deficiencies Allvin/Rutherford re-signed Miller to a long-term contract in September of 2023, a contract worth $8 million over seven years – which is a lot of cash and a lot of term for a 30-year-old, moody centre who can’t play defence. Oh, that contract also had a no-move clause – one of the favourite blunders of the Allvin/Rutherford duo.

Error #2: January, 2023 - The horrible treatment of Bruce Boudreau

By the time Bruce Boudreau was fired from his coaching job on Jan. 23, 2023, few were going to suggest that the man had earned the right to retain his title as Canucks bench boss. Everyone knew Boudreau was going to be fired, and that is the problem: Rutherford actually told media he was looking for a replacement before the axe fell. That was a horrific treatment of an employee and a human being, and it was of such a degree of unprofessionalism, that it caused a leadership analyst to write a column in Forbes, of all places. It signalled a tailspin into the dumpster for team culture. (See #16 below).

Error #3: Jan. 30, 2023 - Trading Bo Horvat

When Allvin/Rutherford traded Bo Horvat, the general discussion was that they couldn’t afford to pay the guy what he was worth on a long-term contract, in part because of the money they need to keep on hand to keep Miller on the payroll. Let's put that in blunt terms: Allvin and Rutherford traded a No. 1 centre, and the captain of the team, in favour of a known dressing-room problem who didn't like playing defence. Nothing says “we have no clue where we’re going” than trading away your team captain when he’s still in the prime of his career (Horvat was 29 at the time) mere days after firing the coach. To put things in perspective, Horvat accepted an eight-year $8.5 million deal after he landed with the New York Islanders.

The return on the trade was, to be blunt, somewhat mediocre. Anthony Beavillier was a middling fourth-line centre, and probably included in the deal as a salary dump so the Islanders could fit Horvat under the cap in the years to come. Atu Raty was heralded as a top prospect, but hasn’t panned out as much more than a fourth-line centre and faceoff specialist. The first-round pick was flipped for Filip Hronek, which is defensible. At the very least, Horvat should have been given the chance to see life under Rick Tocchet, who quite rapidly turned the team around.

Error #4: June 16, 2023 -The Oliver Ekman-Larsson buyout

Previous General Manager Jim Benning’s decision to trade for Ekman-Larsson was a hardly a brilliant move, and the Swedish defender had a horrible time in Vancouver. When the Canucks announced the buyout, few decried it, but it was a gamble that hasn’t paid off. The problem with Ekman-Larsson is that he’s a player who thrives well as a fourth or fifth D-man in a structured environment. The Boudreau days were hardly a shining example of defensive structure, and the former Phoenix Coyotes captain was asked to hold down first-pair minutes. After the buyout, Ekman-Larsson demonstrated how boneheaded this move was by going off to Florida and winning a Stanley Cup. Every year since, he's been solid as a third-pair or occasional second-pair guy.
He’s now on the Toronto Maple Leafs and is at the time of writing, outscoring the Canucks woefully underperforming Elias Petterson (the centre). What would Ekman-Larsson have been like with a full season under Tocchet? (After all, Tocchet turned Tyler Myers from the Chaos Giraffe into a reliable, competent blueliner, didn’t he?) What would the salary cap look like without the burden of Ekman-Larsson’s contract, which will continue to haunt the Canucks until 2031 – another five freaking years?

Error #5: Sept. 11, 2023 - Naming Quinn Hughes as captain

Quinn Hughes is one of the most dynamic players to ever don a Canucks jersey – nobody is going to question that. Really, the only other players who are in the same stratospheric level are named Bure and maybe Luongo. That’s it. But there’s a difference between being exceptionally good as a hockey player and exceptionally good as a captain. Because Allvin/Rutherford blundered in trading Horvat, the team had to name a new captain. Unfortunately, nothing about Hughes in any of the interviews I observed ever gave me the impression he was a good leader. Certainly, his horrible body language and generally pissy demeanor, most notably in the beginnings of the 2025-2026 season lend credence to that view.

Error #6: March 2, 2024 - Resigning Elias Petterson

This is not some retroactive revisionist view: I thought the massive contract for Petterson (the forward) was a bad idea at the time. As one may recall, Petterson didn’t want to sign here, and rather than deal the petulant, soft-skating centre to Carolina for what would have been a heapload of assets that would look damn fine now, Rutherfood/Allvin forced him into signing a monster contract with a no-move clause, essentially paying first-line centre money for a guy who apart from 2022-2023 had been a second-line producer. How’s that working out? To give folks an idea how how tired Vancouver fans are of this guy, Petterson is No. 2 on the Puckpedia Buyout Calculator at the time of writing. (No, that's not going to happen.) The problem now is that Petterson has a no-move clause. Maybe the fact he didn't feel eager enough to be here to resign without prompting is a sign he'll waive that no-move now. One can only hope - but moving the underperforming Petterson is going to require salary retention or a pot-sweetening prospect to make some other team willing to gamble on the guy.

Error #7: July 1, 2024 - Jake Debrusk signing

DeBrusk wasn't what the Canucks needed when he signed, and that hasn't changed since. He's signed to a problematic long-term contract that's costing way more than the value it's delivering. At the time, Allvin/Rutherford hailed Debrusk as the solution for Elias Petterson (the forward) when the problem was never with Petterson's wingers. The problem was always Petterson. Signing Debrusk was a $5.5 million/year gamble that predictably failed.

Error #8: October 2024- January, 2025 - The Petterson – Miller saga.

Whatever took place behind closed doors between Elias Petterson the forward and Miller may never be known. All we as casual spectators know is that something happened. And Miller was involved. None of that happens if Miller had been shown the door at the end of the 2022-2023 season, like he should have been had management given a tinker's damn about culture (see #2 above and #16 below). This leads to ….

Error #9: January 31, 2025 - The Miller trade

The returns from trading J. T. Miller to the New York Rangers were underwhelming to be honest. The major blunder here was taking on Filip Chytil in return, despite the fact Chytil had four concussions with the Rangers. Unsurprisingly, he has had two since, and should probably quit playing hockey before his brain is permanently scrambled. The Czech centre has played just 21 games in two weeks shy of a calendar year. It bears repeating: Chytil’s liability isn’t a reality if the Canucks retain Horvat and let Miller go.

Error #10: March 7, 2025 - Not trading Brock Boeser

At the tail end of the 2024-25 season, Boeser, the well-respected but slow-of-foot winger was a Unrestricted Free Agent who hadn’t committed to re-signing with Vancouver. For some reason, Allvin didn’t move the man at the deadline.

“If I told you what I was offered for Brock Boeser, I think I would have to run out of here because you would not believe me,” Allvin said at the time.

Apart from that coming across as remarkably disrespectful and a sign management has no respect for players (see #16 below), that should have been a clue that more competent managers didn't think Boeser was anywhere near as good as what Canucks management valued him at. (The current analogy is the team waiting for a first-round pick for Kiefer Sherwood, when the market for wingers of his age and skill has long been set at lower.) At the tail end of last year, Boeser had already shown all the signs of peaking (50 points in 24-25 season the overwhelming evidence). A trade might would have likely fetched a second-round pick at the deadline. Heck, anything, really, would have been an asset.

Error #11: May 14, 2025 - Hiring Adam Foote as coach

This never made sense, unless there was some Machiavellian awareness the team was going to be horrific, and Allvin/Rutherford just wanted a placeholder. In any event, Foote was never qualified to coach at this level: his previous coaching record was a roughly .500 record during a season and a half coaching the WHL Kelowna Rockets before he was fired. Foote’s record as an NHL bench boss is now 16-25, and the only real marker left for long-suffering Canucks fan is whether the squad finishes dead-last to maximize the chance of drafting first overall.

Foote ought to be axed at the end of the season, without question. There are structure-dependent players (Tyler Myers, Marcus Petterson) who are suffering, and even early in the season, veteran players signaled they weren’t sure what they were supposed to do. The rookies are learning bad habits. Linus Karlsson is one of the league's best five-on-five and isn't given enough ice-time, while defensive disasters like Brock Boeser and Evander Kane are given priority. Further, it's obvious he hasn't the capacity to bring Atu Raty to the next level, and is it any wonder that Elias Petterson (the defender) is floundering after a solid season under a competent coach the year before? If Hughes hadn’t been certain about leaving, the disaster that Foote has created left no doubt. The team wouldn't be a playoff contender with a better coach, but it would be better.

Error #12: July 1, 2025 - Re-signing Boeser

That hefty, long-term contract with its no-move clause is currently looking like a massive albatross now. Boeser has scored once since Remembrance Day. And why tie up that salary when management was already aware that Quinn Hughes had little intent on staying with the team? Re-signing a slow-moving, older player is not consistent with a rebuild that a departing Hughes necessarily triggers. This is one of many examples of management clearly having no true direction for the team. A critical oversight was the fact that Boeser is not a play-driver, and requires a playmaker (think Miller, Conor Garland), of which the Canucks have .... uh, Garland and that's it. So the fact Boeser is struggling (and still -26 for the year, with 140 active players who have scored more) is of no surprise.

Error #13: July 1, 2025 - Resigning Thatcher Demko at $8.5/year

Why Rutherford/Allvin felt justified handing out a three-year $8.5-million contract to a goaltender with a proven history of being fragile is beyond me. When he’s on, Demko is one of the best. The problem is, he hasn’t been able to play through a season without several injury issues. He started just 23 games in 2024-25, after a freak injury left the stellar 2023-24 team high-and-dry in the playoffs. At the time of writing, Demko has already missed several weeks with injury, and after a mere handful of games is back in the injury ward. Moreover, it has become apparent that management was well aware that Hughes was not going to re-sign, so why gamble on signing Demko for his inconsistent excellence when a rebuild is clearly in the future? And another no-move clause, of course.

Error #14: July 2, 2025 - Signing Pierre-Oliver Joseph

Allvin and/or Rutherford signed this depth defender almost at the outset of free agency. Why? At the time, the Canucks had a stable of players that included Marcus Petterson, Hronek, Hughes (at the time) Tom Willander waiting in the wings, Elias Petterson (the d-man), Derek Forbort (remember him?), Tyler Myers and Victor Mancini. Prior to signing with Vancouver, Joseph had 32 points and 40 penalty minutes in 194 games. He was also -18 for his career, which is now -24 and plummeting every time he plays, which is far too often thanks to Foote having no clue what to do with his d-core. There was no reason to waste $0.775 million on Joseph, who has lived up to exactly what he has always been: irrelevant. Did they not learn from their Vincent Deharnais failure? Might that quarter-million have been used to re-sign Pius Suter - a reliable, versatile center who can kill penalties? Instead the result is a part-time depth defenceman who could likely be replaced by someone younger who is waiver-exempt, a d-man who would help Abbotsford but be there in case of trouble.

Error #15: June 25, 2025 - Trading for Evander Kane

Why? Just … why? Anyone who has been around the NHL knows this guy is problematic. The problem with trading for Kane in June of 2025 wasn’t just that this guy is moody, prone to defensive miscues, and perhaps a bit toxic in the dressing room, it was also his $5.125 million contract.

Error #16: Dec. 2021 - now - Failure to establish culture

You don’t get to the bottom without problems at the top. There’s no clear vision, no clear identity. Nobody knows who is in charge: after the Hughes trade, both Rutherford and Allvin went to separate announcements. To me, it's pretty obvious that Rutherford calls the shots.

Rutherford and Allvin have had four years to improve the culture, and instead, have made it worse. So here we are, with a team that has traded its captain twice in four years, the supposed “star centre” is on track to score maybe 60 points, its generational D-man has bailed for anywhere else but here, injury reports are about as accurate as a seance with a Ouija board, the Adams-winning coach bailed, the current coach is incapable of managing defence, and will likely be replaced at the end of the season (making it five coaches in less than five years) the offence is anemic and there’s no sign that the owner is going to change management before they make any more blunders. The team's culture is a mess... and prominent and respectable journalists like Kevin Woodley say the same thing: https://x.com/i/status/2001049284897329622.

This - all of this - lies at Rutherford and Allvin's feet.

Welcome to the basement, Canucks fans. Might as well bring the sleeping bag: you’re likely to be staying here a while.

Vern Faulkner is a retired award-winning journalist and editor. He’s suffered as a Canucks fan since the mid-seventies, and lacks the moral fibre to move on. 

Those of us who are a Certain Age(tm) may remember when John Carpenter's remake of The Thing hit theatres. Justifiably regarded as a horror classic now, at the time it left a lot of viewers disappointed, confused, and even enraged. "What was with that ending?!"

No spoilers for a 40-year-old film, but we're left, at the end, with two survivors. Neither knows if the other is the murderous, shapeshifting creature, or maybe infected, but doesn't know it. So they share a bottle with what is, hopefully, a fellow human. The end.

Filmgoers in the 1980s weren't fans of ambiguity (see also: almost any other 1980s film) and stayed away in droves. Which is a drag because, again, a horror classic. But viewers didn't get the answers they wanted handed to them on a silver platter with a vellum scroll explaining everything.*

So let's talk Elias Pettersson (the forward).

Starman or Dark Star?

We all know what Elias Pettersson is capable of. Unfortunately, most of us know it by its absence. He has a 100-point season under his belt. He had an 89-point season under his belt. And he has a 66-points in 68 games season under his belt. Then the belt gets a little tight.

In his most recent year, Pettersson finished with a miserable 15 goals and 45 points in 64 games, all three numbers a disappointment. But he did finish strong, getting four goals and ten points in his last ten games. Just as he was getting his game back on a roll, he was injured and missed the last 12 games of the season. There's every reason to think he would have been the Canucks' highest-scoring forward if he remained healthy, but that's in a year nearly everyone else stumbled. So have a grain of salt with the projections.

The question is: what have we seen so far in this season?

He doesn't have the shelter of a J.T. Miller or Bo Horvat working the middle of the ice anymore, so he's going to draw all the attention. Heck, he might not have a Filip Chytil anymore, either. Or a Teddy Blueger, who missed the end of the game against the Capitals.

It's going to sound weird to say, but that shouldn't matter. What we're looking at is how he plays, not just who he plays against.

Big Trouble with Little Sample Size

The biggest issue right now is trying to predict an 82-game season from the first six. There are simply too many variables, including who his teammates will be, to give definite answers there. What we can do is see what's happened so far, and it looks like a tale of two halves.

We can really cut it to "first three/second three" with the start of this road trip being the divider. In two at home and one off in Edmonton, Pettersson has been inconsistent. In every post-game conversation, reviewers will mention "flashes of the old Petey" or a specific play or two that caught their eye. But he was never The Man in the game. Quite the opposite, really, with never standing out.

In those first three games, he managed a minuscule three shots through to the net, one per game, and just one assist. He did protect the puck well, but didn't do much to really earn more than his 16 minutes or so of ice time. He didn't inspire fear in opposing coaches. The constant threat wasn't there.

In the more recent three, though, he's made a solid pairing with Conor Garland. When the duo have lined up with either Evander Kane or Drew O'Connor, chances to score have emerged. Even including their most recent match against the Capitals, with a tired and wildly undermanned forward group, Pettersson made his mark.

The post-game conversation has switched from "occasional flashes" to "he made that play work". He's intercepting passes, breaking up opposing rushes, finding his teammates more easily. The other phrase you started to hear was that he was snakebit. Doing the right thing, just unlucky not to score. Which is a heck of a lot better than not having the chances.

Finally getting his first goal in Washington was nice, but better was how he scored it. Finding the empty spot, slowing time, and putting it right where he wanted. Lindgren watched him shoot, but really had no chance. That's an Elias Pettersson kind of goal.

The roadie started in the worst possible way for Pettersson when he deflected a puck into his own net, but since then? It's not that "He's Back!" so much as "He's changed." We just have to see to what.

Emerging From The Fog

On what is a vibes-based team, Pettersson is key. His skill is only part of his game. There is a certain arrogance he plays with that goes beyond that. You can feel it when he's on, and it's awesome.

When Quinn Hughes is at the top of his game, you can see him calculating his best next play. There are numbers running over his head while he walks the blue line, taking everything in. He's putting the work in, updating the equations as he collects new information, and it shows. The amazing thing is that it doesn't slow him down in the slightest.

With Pettersson at the top of his game, everything he does feels virtually effortless. That's ridiculous, of course, because some of what he does is throwing himself in front of consecutive Alex Ovechkin shots, and there's nothing easy about that! But it feels like he's done all his work before the game and is prepared for whatever happens next. He trusts that what he does next will be the right play.

Thing is, that doesn't always mean points. Other thing is, that could still be well worth $11.6 million.

Memoirs of an Invisible Star

My scoring expectations for Elias Pettersson are fairly modest, and also not modest at all. I expect he'll hover at or just below a point-per-game throughout his career. Is THAT worth his massive paycheque? On its own, no. Which is why I expect he'll do more than just score.

One of the most ridiculously underrated stars in the league is retiring after this season. To me, Elias Pettersson could do far worse than follow the career of Anže Kopitar.

Kopitar was halfway through his career by the time he was Pettersson's age. Between the ages of 20 and 26, he scored 182 goals and 485 points in 532 games. Pettersson's numbers are 185 goals and 459 points in 476 games. But Kopitar has always been more than his scoring, picking up two Selke Trophies and three Lady Byngs in the back half of his career.

Those are the kind of numbers Pettersson has the talent to replicate. He also has the defensive chops to be in the Selke conversation in the coming years. He doesn't have the advantage of Kopitar's mass and never will, but that hasn't stopped him from being remarkably effective getting between the puck and his own net.

And before you say that Kopitar's only making $7 million this year, remember he signed a $10 x 8-year deal when he was 29 years old, back in 2016. The salary cap then was $73 million, not 2024's $88 million. Anyone want to argue that he wasn't worth it?

Sure, we need to see more from Pettersson than we have so far this year. Some do say that he's being paid like a star, so he should score like one. I say he should get his points, obviously. But if he's lining up against the opposition's best and beating them regularly, game in and game out? Then he doesn't need 100 points for the team to win. And that will be worth it.

*Not that I'm critical of that approach or anything. Weenies.

If this is true, this will make 4 coaches in 4 years for the Canucks. Ouch.

It had seemed like the Canucks and Tocchet were working towards an agreement, though the news of the team having a bit of an issue with making him one of the league's highest paid coaches appears to have been a bigger issue than first thought.

We're currently waiting to see if there's an announcement forthcoming from the team, it does send out some warning bells in terms of the impact this decision could have. There was the endorsement from the Captain a few days ago, where Quinn Hughes raved about how much he loved playing for Tocchet. It's already going to be hard enough to get the best player this team's ever had to re-sign to a long term deal, and letting the coach he wanted to play for isn't going to help.

As far as potential replacements, there are a number of coaches out there right now that are looking for work. Mike Sullivan is one, and has a history both with the Canucks as well as Jim Rutherford and Patrik Allvin. It makes one wonder if this news has anything to do with Sullivan becoming available this week, though perhaps it's coincidence. Sullivan was an assistant for John Tortorella in that one cursed season Torts was inflicted upon us.

Another potential move for the Canucks, would be to keep things in house and move Manny Malhotra up from the Abbotsford Canucks of the AHL. Malhotra's garnered praise for the season the Canucks put together in the wake of endless recalls to deal with the parent club's constant parade of injuries, and currently has them in the Second Round of the AHL Playoffs. I think there's a real chance Malhotra is brought in sometime, but this seems too soon, and I would prefer he got a little more experience before leading this team.

Was the Canucks unwillingness (read: the Aqualini family) to build a permanent practice facility a factor in Tocchet not re-signing? If so, this is another strike against an ownership that was ranked 31st in a poll of players in the Athletic not too long ago.

It's shocking that just over a year ago they were a game away from the Western Conference Finals, and now they're (back) in disarray, and could again be a very different looking team come training camp. As far as Tocchet goes, if he doesn't end up in Pittsburgh, expect him to sign in Philadelphia.

Is this the right move for the Canucks? Time will tell, but coming off a disappointing season where a number of the Canucks best players were far from their best, and the team repeatedly churned out lifeless, uninspiring performances, it certainly didn't make sense to give him a massive raise. Bringing him back, fine. But it's clear he wants to move on, and if this means a new coaching staff that can work with players and re-energize them (Elias Pettersson, for example), then let's get this done.

I also should mention that Westy was advocating for this, and I did mention more than once that the systems the Canucks were using were a big part of their lack of success this season. Maybe we're gonna get what we want for a change? It's weird, because as Canucks fans, this isn't a thing that happens.

UPDATE: No Return For Taco Confirmed

Well, we made it through another offseason. This one was better than others, but still had us wondering, “What will it take for this team to shake the bad voodoo off?” The Canucks were one Thatcher Demko away from getting into the Conference finals. Unlike last October, the fans actually have expectations for this team, and I wonder if we are all just setting ourselves up for a major disappointment. The start of the season already has it share of questions, with Demko’s injuries and Joshua’s cancer, this team will have to find ways to win without a full complement of weapons.

As always, I think there are some areas that have some questions attach to them and will determine if this team can be a contender this year or if the one year of “Holy fuck, they won again.” Was a mirage.

1. Thatcher Demko’s lower body

If you go through Demko’s injuries over his career, his lower body seems to have past some sort of warranty due date. Of course, any person over 6’2 who is ask to drop down repeatedly to his knees and back up, will have wear and tear issues. The Canucks played a far better style of team defense last year, which helped them win a lot of games. To win a cup though, the Canucks need Demko to be healthy to steal the games where the special teams are less than special.

2. The Penalties that kill.

Last year, by the end of the regular season, the Canucks PK was almost at 80%. This was a great improvement over the year before. Unfortunately, this number was still in the bottom half of the league. And man, did the Oilers pick them apart in the 2^nd round at some points. Coach Taco had JT and Petey out there playing PK at certain points, which did lead to some shorthanded goals, but I am sold on those guys playing more minutes on special teams, especially when the team took lots of dumb penalties. A better PK starts with taking less penalties period…and then a system that is more aggressive.

3. Defense…..(clap, clap, clap)……Defense

The loss of Nikita was expected and sad at the same time. The loss of Ian Cole….already forgotten. It will be interesting to see two different areas. The first one is having Myers/Soucy as a “2^nd” pairing. The giraffe tandem got some playing time together last year and were Jekyll and Hyde. The new pairing of Forbort/Deshy will probably get sheltered minutes until Taco gets a feel for their strengths and weaknesses. The next area will be the role of the forwards, especially the new ones, and how they are asked to protect the bottom two pairings.

4. Petey.

This is probably issue number 1 or 1a. Petey’s decline in the 2^nd half of the regular season and the playoffs is well-documented. He says injuring, the team said, “Say what now?” Petey is now in the first year of a monster contract and should feel less pressure…and hopefully injury free. It looks like he will get some new linemates who can score, which frees him up to create space and distribute the puck, which will open more space for his shot. It goes without saying that the team needs him to put up 90+ points and gets more of them 5vs5. Some will say that the asshole, JT, is the main cog for this team because he produces no matter what condition Petey is in, but a healthy Petey against Edmonton, could have won that series without Demko.

5. That DeBrusk guy.

Remember when everyone was saying that Guentzel was the piece to put the Canucks over the top. Me neither. The other Jake is who we got and he might be a cheaper version of Guentzel, who could put up 30+, playing with Petey. In my mind, I see a Sprong/Petey/Debrusk line, with each of them scoring 30+. (I am greedy like that). Hopefully Jake brings some of that annoying Boston swagger and douchebaggery to keep people honest around Petey. For the Canucks to have three lines that score, then Jake has to put up numbers for the 2^nd line to score.

6. That October schedule

Ever heard the adage, “Win 50 games, win a prize!” Well, the prize the Canucks got was a shitty schedule to open the year. 7 games against Eastern teams, including 2 against Philly, one against Pitt, TB, New Jersey and Carolina. The Canucks are straight into the fire to start the year, and I really am hoping for a .500 or better start. Watch them lose to Chicago.

The Canucks are more of an enigma to predict this year than last. Last year they were supposed to be a shit show on certain days and played far better than anyone predicted. This year, do we hold them to that level, knowing Demko is not healthy, that the defense and offense has new parts….or do we downplay the success and dream of realistic scenarios. The Eeyore in me sees doom and gloom and hopes we can make it into the playoffs with no injures.

The end is near and the beginning is right after that. It’s been a long time since Wille D and the Sedins led the Canucks to their last true playoff appearance. And if you can’t pick up on it, I am not a fan of the play-in scenario that got the Nucks into the “Bubble” playoffs. A lot has gone wrong over the past 9 years with this team and so getting back to the promised land, especially in a year that still had so much doubt, is sweet for those of us who remember King Richard.

This season is not winding down the way I would have liked to have seen. I can only say that because of the start this team had and carried until the all-star break. I decided to look over the past 15 games to see what patterns emerge from this team, besides the inability to beat Colorado. Over that span over 15 games, the Canucks have gone 9-5-1, which has helped them hold on to first place in the division.

The Canucks never won a game where they allowed more 3 goals or more. That is a big change from earlier games this season, where the Canucks had won 13 games where team had scored 3 or more against them.  Some of this…if not all of this can be due to the fact that Coach Taco has this team playing a very tight shut down system that won’t cheat to try and get that odd-man breakout. Unfortunately, when the players don’t buy into the system, there are some games that get away from them fast as seen by a 5-1 loss to LA and a 6-3 loss to Vegas.

A fundamental part of Taco’s system is that the team can’t be static while defending. They have to be picking up players or getting to spots before the opponent. When that is not happening, penalties seem to pop up, which continue to be a problem against certain teams.

I think special teams might have to become more special in the playoffs. I am sure some will bring up the fact that Demko’s injury plays a part in the bad PK numbers in losses….and it does. But there is also something to be said about how this team gets out of position and takes the bad penalty, which Demko has to bail them out of. I have said all year that the Canucks PP has struggled against PKs that are aggressive, coming out to the point and rotate quickly. I apologize for putting this out on the net for all the other coaches to read, but I am sure they would have caught it by now. Kevin Bieska will always be right with his quote, “Shots, shots, shots..” That has to happen more frequently. Instead of looking for that perfect Sedin pass.

Thatcher should come off LTIR in time for Saturday’s game, but no one is really sure what the hell is going on with Elias Lindholm. Some rumors have him out for the remainder of the year, some say it’s a wrist issue that might be ready before the playoffs.  I don’t think Lindholm being out for the playoffs would have the same effect if it was Joshua missing. I know…bold statement, but Dakota provides that 3^rd line speed, muscle and scoring touch that is needed for the playoffs. Hopefully, the Canucks can get three lines moving again. Speaking of scoring…wouldn’t it be nice to have Podz get a couple before the playoffs start? He has done of the little things right in his own end, but just can’t get his hard shot off in time.

Usually by this time of year, teams have an idea of who their opponent with be in the first round, but the playoff picture is so muddled that the Nucks may not know until the last day. I know this, the Nucks don’t want to face any team in the West right now. None of them. Unfortunately, it seems they have to. So if I had to pick a team to face in the first round, it would be Nashville. Two reasons for this, first off, the Canucks have beat them every time this year. Secondly, the Preds had their long winning streak, so it’s out of their system and the law of averages makes them a more favorable opponent.

What do you think?